People should be happy when they see that their favorite suitcase is getting old, more starched, dirtier – the suitcase usually care within not only clothes and things. Suitcase care our memories as well. I'm happy to see that mine, after all those years, is beautifully terrible. Every time while I’m filling it with clothes and dreams of what the future will bring. And when I’m unpacking, taking everything from the inside – I’m remembering.
Last person who carried this luggage was my previous lover.
He became a father today and I was happy to be one of the persons with whom he shared his big news. Crazy times we’re living in, I’m thinking to myself while trying to squeeze all my life in 20kg. The news that once broke my heart, today is strangely gratifying. We had to meet each other. In this point, I believe in destiny. He had to grab my luggage in that airport so we would learn lessons which we would never be able to learn without meeting each other. To understand what I would not have understood without such "accidents" of life. I wonder how many people’s fingerprints are left on my blue suitcase. How many of them has stayed? Did you stay? And suddenly I smile again.
That scary, beautiful feeling having one way ticket. Again.
The feeling is similar to the first date, where you don't know if you will be a “match” for each other, but you willing to give a try, because from the first sign – it could be a life time love. And since people no longer invite on a dates, I choose to travel – to get back that feeling, that excitement. And when I start to be afraid, because, once again, I’m going where no one is waiting or inviting, I remind myself how 4 years ago I hit the road with only few sentences in English( which I’ve learned few months before my trip) and somehow I survived. Yet, that was the best thing I’ve ever done. I believe I am still doing the right thing now. ,,We build the most important relationship not with others, but with ourselves’’. And if it’s true, that you’ll get to know yourself the most by kicking yourself out of your comfort zone, then, my beloved Agne, how good it will be to get to know you again.
This time not on another side of the world. To Barcelona. If you will be around – let me know. I’m always happy to see beloved faces somewhere in the world.
I hope the wheels of my suitcase will survive a few airports more. And then, somewhere and someday it will become a beautiful interior detail.
Although, as the past year has shown, such an outcome is unlikely.
I reach level 21 on Duolingo. I already know how to order a beer in Spanish. Apparently, I will survive.
Hasta luego!